


Melancholic

by STARSdidathing



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Confessions, Feels, Fluff, Fluff without Plot, Hopeful Ending, Loki & Tony Stark Friendship, Loki (Marvel) Feels, Loki (Marvel) Gets a Hug, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Oblivious Tony Stark, Pining, Post-Avengers (2012), Romantic Fluff, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Is Not Helping, Wordcount: 1.000-5.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 15:34:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22289473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/STARSdidathing/pseuds/STARSdidathing
Summary: Loki is unhappy, and Tony just wants to fix it. He wants his friend to smile again.
Relationships: Loki/Tony Stark
Comments: 62
Kudos: 508





	Melancholic

Loki had been acting odd lately.

Which, okay, was a bit of a long bow to draw when it came to a mischievous, trickster chaos god, but where other people might not understand Loki, Tony liked to think he was different.

Loki had come to the tower on orders from Odin to ‘redeem himself’. Loki had been bored and unimpressed, but underneath that, Tony had noticed curiosity every time the demi-god had looked at him. Tony was intrigued by Loki too, so he decided to prod the villain and see what happened.

Surprisingly, what happened was a friendship.

The two of them just clicked. They fit together without any of the frustrations or complications Tony had experienced with people in the past. It had taken _years_ for Tony and Rhodey to get as close as this, but with Loki it took months.

Loki was able to work with him at three in the morning, and laugh with him at two in the afternoon. He would spar with Tony in the training rooms, make jokes with him over the comms during a battle – and, when Pepper broke up with him, Loki was there to help mend the fissures that had formed in his heart.

But, Tony was better now, he was _happy_ – and that was the big thing that was wrong with Loki, when Tony thought about it. Loki wasn’t just acting odd, he seemed down and disheartened.

And that wasn’t allowed when you were Tony Stark’s friend.

It was why he plotted and schemed with JARVIS and wheedled a week off from SI obligations. When everything was ready and the bags were packed, he burst into Loki’s bedroom.

Loki was lying on his back, staring at the ceiling. He lifted his head to frown at Tony.

“Anthony? What are you-”

“No time to waste. Up and at ‘em.” 

Tony threw open Loki’s closet and started grabbing clothes at random.

“Anthony,” Loki’s voice was sharper. “What in the Norns are you doing?”

Tony paused and looked over his shoulder. Loki was sitting up and scowling. That was better than passively laying on his bed. Progress already!

“You, Reindeer Games, have won the very lucky treat of spending a week in Malibu with me.” Tony held up his hand, to pre-emptively stop Loki saying anything else. He was being overly dramatic, he knew it, but Loki always laughed when he did. “I know, I know. It’s amazing. Don’t thank me all at once. Or faint. It will be hard to carry you to the plane if you faint.”

He was rewarded by Loki rolling his eyes and a hint of a smirk touching his lips. “You are ludicrous.”

“Maybe,” Tony agreed, “but I’m also your travel buddy. So stop wasting time.” 

He made a gesture with his hands, trying to encourage Loki to stand. When that didn’t work Tony stepped closer and held out his hands. He flashed his most charming smile.

“Come on, Lokes. Join me on vacation?”

Loki crumpled, and although his smile remained, it was now tinged with the sadness Tony was trying to force away. “Very well.”

He placed his hand in Tony’s and allowed himself to be pulled from the bed. They ended close enough their chests brushed and Tony looked up at Loki with surprise – but Loki didn’t catch his gaze. He let Tony’s hands go and stepped towards his closet to select his clothes.

Tony shook the feeling off and happily began to explain the plans he had for their week away.

He hoped that once they landed in Malibu, got in one of his cars and had the wind whipping through their hair, Loki would finally smile again.

* * *

The truth was, Tony had tried to pinpoint exactly what was upsetting Loki.

He had ruled out the Avengers, Thor, and the general dislike Earth had about the mage. Loki didn’t care about any of those things (except Thor, but that was a whole different thing and didn’t make him _sad_ rather, it made him angry).

The only thing Tony had been able to come up with was that he was longing for something – _missing_ something. The answer was simple: Asgard. He missed his home and his adopted-but-still-totally-his-mother.

So, Tony tried to distract him.

He jam-packed every day full of things he thought Loki would like (and then a few he thought Loki would bitch about but secretly enjoy).

It was good, they were having _fun_ and sometimes, Loki did smile like he used to. He also laughed and acted like all the worries had fallen off his shoulders – but, it didn’t last. He’d get a look in his eyes or a tightness to his smile and Tony’s heart would fall.

He tried his best, he really did. He even offered, late one night, over drinks, if Loki wanted to talk about Asgard (or wanted Tony to try and wrangle a chance for him to visit, his bullshit sentence be damned). Loki had looked confused then surprised and then he’d looked _pained_. The emotion was even more sharply acute than normal.

“No, thank you,” Loki had said, his voice quiet. He’d also put down his drink without finishing it and stood. “I will retire for the night.”

Tony had started to say the other man’s name, his arm outstretched as if to pull him back, but Loki was already turning and walking away. Tony didn’t mention Asgard again, but he did try to cook breakfast the following morning in apology.

It was an utter disaster, but Loki had laughed at him. He’d also swept in and done the cooking himself and even made a smiley face on Tony’s pancakes. Tony had flicked a strawberry at him, but he’d known he was forgiven.

Honestly, it was one of the best vacations Tony had ever had, and if it wasn’t for Loki’s lingering sadness, he would call it a success.

Loki _did_ seem happier and like he was having fun, but there was still something missing, and it was obvious that it was hurting him.

It was why when he found Loki standing alone on the balcony on the last day of their vacation, Tony didn’t leave him to his solitude. He stepped outside and joined him. Loki didn’t tense or say a word, and Tony followed suit, just looking down at the ocean and waiting as patiently as he was able.

It took a few minutes, but eventually, Loki sighed. Tony glanced over at him and found Loki staring at his hands like they held the answers to all his problems. His shoulders were heavy and his expression weary.

“I know why you brought me here, Anthony.”

Tony could be flippant or dismissive, but he knew it wasn’t the time for a joke.

“I thought it might help,” Tony admitted.

Loki’s smile was wry. “Oh, it helped and it hindered in equal measure, Anthony.”

Tony frowned. “I don’t understand.”

“I don’t know why you believe I miss Asgard. It is a place that has scorned and despised me more than Midgard ever has.” He closed his eyes. “My spell books, perhaps, yes I miss those, and the privacy of my rooms – but they are not enough to hold my attention. They will be mine again in time.”

Tony’s frown deepened. “Then what-”

“You.”

Tony startled, wondering if he’d misheard but Loki was watching him with sad, serious eyes.

“What?” he asked.

“The source of my… melancholy, I suppose you can call it.” Loki turned away and stared out at the sea, his lips were a thin line, his gaze still pained. “I was holding onto a foolish hope for a very long time. It is no surprise that even I could not hold onto the illusion forever.” His smile was wistful and his words were heartbreaking. “So, yes, I have liked our vacation, but I have hated it just as much. To be so close to the one you want and yet, forever out of their reach.” He gave an absent shrug. “I will accept it in time, Anthony. Do not waste further time worrying over my happiness.”

He pushed away from the balcony the moment he finished. He didn’t look at Tony, he turned on his heel and left, and Tony was too busy reeling from shock to stop him.

At least, for a few seconds.

When he realised _what_ had happened, he was darting back inside the house. Panic was constricting his heart as he feared Loki disappearing, but the other man was at the bar, grabbing two glasses and already filling them with alcohol.

“Loki-” Tony tried.

“I trust this won’t damage our friendship,” Loki stated, focusing on the alcohol. “You are a handsome and desirable man. You’ve had your share of besotted acquaintances.” He finally raised his eyes, and he tried for a smirk, it actually looked genuine. “At least with me, you will not need to worry about tears.”

“Christ Loki,” Tony said, finally managing to string a few words together. “You should have said something.”

“Why?” Loki asked, moving around the bar but stopping a polite distance away. He held out the drink. “And put you in an awkward position? And discomfort you? Believe me, Anthony, were you not stubborn enough to eventually work it out for yourself, I would never have told you.”

“You would have hidden this?” Tony asked, the thought hurting more than he expected. “You would have pretended it wasn’t hurting you? That _I_ wasn’t hurting you?”

“It is _not_ your fault,” Loki snapped, his voice harsh and his eyes narrowed. “You will not blame yourself for this, Anthony.”

“How can I not?” Tony argued back. “I was so fucking oblivious I didn’t notice that you-”

But the words stuck on his tongue: _want me? Like me? Love me?_

Tony didn’t know which it was but all of them made his heart race. 

Loki just made a frustrated noise and thrust the glass of alcohol at Tony’s chest. He grabbed it on instinct and their fingers brushed – Loki jerked away like he was burnt. He turned his back to Tony.

“Anthony,” he said, and unlike each time before, his voice didn’t sound composed, it sounded _raw_ , like every bit of heartache was leaking into his voice. “Please, don’t drag this out.”

Tony’s heart twisted and he took a careful step forward. He kept his voice low. “What do you mean? What do you want me to do?”

Loki tensed, but he didn’t say a word. Tony already had a fairly good idea. Loki was down, was upset, was _melancholy_ because he’d accepted that he and Tony would only be friends. Loki was waiting for that to be voiced and for that last hint of hope to disappear.

Because he _hadn’t_ fully given up. Loki was one of the most stubborn people Tony knew, he wouldn’t give up on the chance unless it was denied straight to his face and with no sugar-coating. 

But, how could Loki ever believe that Tony would do that?

Stepping up behind Loki, Tony hesitated for only a moment before he wrapped his arm around Loki’s waist and pressed himself to the taller man’s back. Loki sucked in a sharp breath and went as stiff as a bowstring. Tony closed his eyes and pressed his cheek against his friend’s back.

Maybe, he didn’t know what he was doing – but maybe he was just taking the next logical step. They fit together so damn well as friends, who was to say it wouldn’t be better if they were lovers?

Who was to say Loki didn’t _deserve_ to get his chance?

Squeezing Loki gently, Tony said, “What do you know? Not so far out of reach as you think.”

“ _Anthony_ ,” Loki’s voice was strangled by a hundred doubts and fears.

“I don’t like it when you’re unhappy, Loki,” Tony told him firmly. “I’d much rather take a chance to fix it then know I never tried.” Loki barely seemed to be breathing and Tony stroked his thumb against Loki’s hip soothingly. “But, your call if you want to-”

“Yes,” Loki interrupted him, not even hesitating. “Do you think I would even _hesitate-_ ”

Yet, he cut himself off, his voice getting rough and tremulous at the end. Tony made a soothing noise and tightened his hold, trying to assure Loki that it was okay, that he was _here_ – that Loki had finally gained the chance he’d long desired.

And maybe Tony was diving in feet first without checking for rocks or sharks, but Tony didn’t think of it that way. It felt more like looking at an enemy with curious green eyes and deciding to see what would happen.

Tony liked to think that just like before, he would turn out with something wonderful.

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo, I like to imagine Loki will be trying so hard not to show how terrified he is that everything will turn to shit. That Tony will decide he doesn't want/like him. That his chance will be stolen and his heart crushed.
> 
> But halfway through their first date it's just so simple and easy that he _forgets_ to be worried, he _forgets_ this is meant to scary.
> 
> And when he realises - realises it was all so effortless for them both, when Tony is reaching out and brushing their hands together and looks _happy_ \- well, he just beams. He's so suddenly flushed with hope and happiness, and it's that look in his eyes - the look Tony has been _waiting_ for ever since he invited him to Malibu, that makes Tony lean in and kiss him.
> 
> It makes Tony and Loki both know, they made the right decision (for Loki to talk and for Tony to accept) - and they also know that this right here, will turn out better than okay.


End file.
